Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Lifelong Kindergarten at the MIT Media Lab

I'm in love.

Take a fire-breathing upshot who is bent on changing the world. Mix in a passion for learning and improving the lives of children everywhere. Have a Pritzker Prize Architect design a building and put him inside. Inject $27 million from the former CEO of Sega to create a dedicated laboratory, while connecting him to the brightest and most creative minds in the world. Give him colleagues and professors who are dedicated to making a difference, and have done so for years... and place it all in an environment that takes creativity, passion, and performance for granted.

Welcome to the Lifelong Kindergarten Group at the MIT Media Lab.

My entire life is dedicated to changing the world of education. I want so badly to influence the future to be better for children and others than what is available in the present - to take the blessings of education and share them across the boundaries of time and space... and now seems like the best time to be applying to study at MIT (work hard, play hard) with Lifelong Kindergarten.

Here are a few of the current and past projects at the MIT Media Lab.

Scratch:
Scratch is an easy-to-learn programming language that puts complex computer programming into simple terms. Using a friendly user interface, Scratch turns code into visual block-like elements that can be connected and interchanged to create anything, from games to dance competitions. The language was designed to be incredibly simple, and it's incredibly successful, with tons of users and uploaded projects on the site. Forums, "game creation companies", and other collaborative entities have all been created due to the program, engaging children of all ages. When was the last time you played a computer game or watched an interactive story written by a 12-year-old? By manipulating code and creating their own modes of expression, children learn important skills while creating lasting, useful projects. The possibility of collaboration has also created a society around Scratch, complete with jargon and teenage experts... and there is so much more.

One of my visions for Scratch is to find ways to insert it into present-day educational systems. I would love to completely change the way that we assess students, but since that will not happen in a heartbeat, creating bilingual assessment tools (that effectively engage children and allow them the freedom to learn through play... while also communicating through the bureaucracy to "prove" learning has taken place) is a way to prepare classrooms for when it finally happens. Delineating all the skills that can be gained by students using Scratch, and finding ways to show the development of those skills, could increase its use in the world substantially. And since increasing the user base of Scratch also increases its value (due to user submissions), more and more applications would become apparent for traditional classroom use.

Crickets:
Crickets are little boxes that can be programmed to respond to a variety of external stimuli. Like Scratch, Crickets were designed to be simple, requiring very few initial instructions, so that children could immediately learn as they constructed a vision of the object's functionality from their own experiences.

Programmable Beads, Crickets for the Blind, Tradable Bits...
I mention these because they truly denote the environment at MIT. Get an idea about anything. Add passion, an injection molder, and a circuitboard constructor, and you have a working prototype. I would have trouble valuing invisible bits instead of trading cards, but someone had an idea and took it to fruition. At MIT anything is possible.

LEGO Programmable Bricks:
To a kid who has played with K'NEX all his life, the very thought of moving to LEGO's made me cringe. I have always been completely sold on the multiple methods of connecting, the freely moving parts, the lack of sharp edges, and the anti-choking feature of air holes in each piece (not that I ever ate my K'NEX, but it was comforting to know that, if I did, I wouldn't choke to death if they got stuck on the way down). But bricks that move on their own is way beyond the little motors that come with K'NEX - and they allow a freedom of motion I only dreamed about playing with K'NEX. Programmable bricks (or K'NEX pieces) would enable people to create interactive sculptures - able to respond to input and change according to the viewer... Maybe while I'm there, I'll create programmable K'NEX. Then I wouldn't have to be torn between beauty and function.


The New MIT Media Lab Building:
For 10 Years MIT has been planning a new building for its Media Lab... but a dozen things have stood in the way. In the meantime, the media lab has grown so crowded that Administration has taken down cabinets in the affectionately called "Cube" so that there is more space. The new building, which will attach to the old one via a series of beautiful walkways, was designed by a Pritzker Prize winner - a major prize in architecture - and focuses on openness. There will be plenty of open spaces, allowing passerby to see into the building and the research groups, and enabling the easy collaboration between groups. Sounds like my favorite study area - the NoShhh! Zone.

The Okawa Center for Future Children:
Now it starts to get really incredible. Isao Okawa was an incredible man who believed that children held the key to the future... and that we, as members of society, should look to them for the solutions to problems in life. As a businessman, he was amazingly successful, running dozens of companies including SEGA and CSK. The Okawa Center for Future Children at MIT is a sister center to one created in Japan, and was funded by a generous $27 million donation to MIT. At the center, professors and graduate students (probably including those in the Lifelong Kindergarten Group, and hopefully including me) will have the opportunity to interface with students to innovate and create new technologies and teaching tools that will benefit the lives of students all over the world, especially those in third-world countries. Think about it - what tools or technologies could we create to improve the learning of children all over the world?

Mitchel Resnick:
As Director of the MIT Media Arts and Sciences Program and the Lifelong Kindergarten research group, Mitchel Resnick has been on my list of potential heroes for a while. He is the hero of my thesis advisor here at BYU, and worked closely with Seymour Papert in the early days of the MIT Media Lab. I've never met him in person, but over the last few years I've read his books and papers, watched his webcasts, and followed his classroom blogs. I can hear his thick Bostonian accent and see his face light up when he talks about enabling children to learn through play. Mitchel Resnick is one of the reasons I've wanted to attend MIT - to better understand the pathway that is being beaten between play and the rigors of academia. I really believe that in the directed chaos seen in play there are the seeds of a better world... and, in the field of education, where the destiny of mankind and civilization hangs in the balance, I think there is no better place to learn.

My Plans:
MIT accepted applications until Dec 15. I chose incredible people for my letters of recommendation, spent hundreds of hours working on my portfolio, and wrote and re-wrote my "Statement of Objectives" essay dozens of times... The website says that they schedule interviews for some groups during February, while acceptance letters are mailed March 31 - my little sister's birthday. I'm praying that I'll have the opportunity to grow and learn in the best environment possible... and I'm hoping that environment is MIT.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Living Life as it Comes

Dear Family and Friends,

I'm sitting in the Chicago O'Hare Airport and snow is falling quickly enough that the sky is a mix of gray and white that I've only seen during a Midwest winter storm. My flight is delayed, which means I'll be missing more classes than I originally intended, but I can't really complain – I love to meet new people no matter what the occasion... and I still haven't written this letter.

Imagine the scene. Half a dozen children racing around the house at top speed, turning sharp corners faster than seems possible. Regular intervals of alternating screams and laughter echoing through the halls. Multiple parts of the same piano pieces played over and over again. Preparing food, eating, cleaning up the messes... and preparing food again. And the rare quiet moment when family members stop and talk. To an outsider, it may resemble barely controlled chaos... but to me, it's home. I had the opportunity to go home for Thanksgiving this year and I loved every minute of it. From the 10 hours spent in the Salt Lake Airport trying to fly standby to the hours we are spending waiting for our plane to be de-iced, life takes its twists and turns and I am happy.

We found a little store this week called Nuts 2 You. We were driving home Wednesday evening, with kids screaming in the back seat, and I saw a huge sign that read, “NUTS.” I pointed it out and we decided to go. We walked into the little shop and I fell in love. The walls were lined with bins of loose nuts, dried fruit, candy, and other items, and the manager greeted us with a thickly accented, “Hello sweetie, are you finding everything?” We browsed the shelves and learned she was diabetic (hence why she couldn't suggest a favorite candy... and also why there was a large sugar-free section of the store) and from the Ukraine. We were the only people in the store who didn't speak her foreign tongue (wither Russian or Ukrainian - I couldn't tell which)... which made reading labels nearly impossible. We found some great deals on dried fruit and dried tomatoes, but as we checked out she motioned to me to follow her into the back section of the store with a grocery bag. She proceeded to dump a whole box (10 pounds!) of Russian Marmalade into the bag, smiled at me, then grabbed a few boxes of chocolates and placed them in my arms. When I realized what she was doing, I was somewhat taken aback – the last time a storekeeper had just given me boxes of food was on my mission.

I only have a few weeks of school left before finals... and then I begin teaching physics at Riverton High School. At some points, I feel incredibly excited to be out teaching... making a difference in the lives of students... helping them to gain a love of the natural world. And other times, I wonder if I will ever be able to put into action the ideals I've carried with me all these years. Can I really be an incredible teacher? Can I communicate and instill a love of learning for my students? Or will I end up using the same old ineffective teaching tools that I learned in my worst nightmares of classrooms?

Finally. 4 hours after our initial departure time, the plane has taken off. What began as a crew delay turned into waiting in line for hours for de-icing and then into a taxi all the way around the airport when our scheduled runway was closed for snow removal. But we're safely flying now, and there were no problems with the landing gear or flocks of geese getting caught in the turbines (some of my past experiences with flying). And I've had a great conversation with a woman sitting next to me.

I think the message the Lord is trying to teach me this week is to live life as it comes. I love to make plans for life – to think that I know what I'm going to be doing in 10 years or 2 years or 2 weeks – but it's rarely true... and that's ok. Life doesn't need to go as planned from our perspective to go right from His. We never planned to find that nut store, I originally planned to be a Horticulture / Music Dance Theater major, and I know my flight was supposed to leave at 7:25. But as I look back on my life, I can see how the spontaneity of the Lord's plans have often been right on time... even when they may have destroyed my prior plans. We make a quick left turn into a shopping center and find my siblings' new “favorite store.” I realize a love for teaching and dedicate my life to the profession. And long hours give me time to reflect on the things I've learned at the hand of the Lord these last few days. Looking to the future, with plans of graduate school and a career sparkling in my mind, I wonder why lays in store. I guess the right answer would be this: whatever happens, if I look to the Lord for my strength, it will all be for my good.

Life has an endless supply of impromptu bumps for each of us. Some are trite, like being delayed a few hours in the airport or losing a set of car keys... but others can tear our world apart as we know it. The lesson I am learning is this: even when life doesn't go as planned, it is going according to His Plan. The Lord is with us – cheering when we succeed and mourning with us when life is hard. He knows our fears, our hopes, our dreams, and everything we need in order to be ultimately happy – after all is said and done... and He loves us enough to send the blessings and trials necessary to make that possible. I know that He loves us and is with us. There will always be reasons to smile and give thanks, whether you are delayed in a snow-covered airport or praying at your bedside. James 5:11 – Behold, we count them happy which endure... Give the Lord your burdens, and share the gift He has given you... Be of good cheer. I have overcome the world. Go out and be missionaries!

I love you all!

David

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thankful For: Food

I'm thankful for food. I'm thankful for the incredible variety of choices I have of things to eat, even if I only eat things that are healthy. I'm grateful for the peace that eating healthy food brings to my body and to my soul... and for the happiness that comes from watching others enjoy the food I make for them. I'm grateful for parents who were willing to let me be an experimental chemist in the kitchen... who never reprimanded me with more than a sour face when I made something that was truly awful... and who made me feel like a hero when I discovered a new technique or recipe that made eating more enjoyable.

I made vegan (well, almost - if you discount the anchovies in Worcestershire sauce) Cincinnati Chili last night. My little sister had lamented that it was once her favorite dish, and I decided to be creative. I soaked some soybeans, shredded them in the blender, mixed them with the rest of the ingredients, and made a few minor modifications. Amazingly, it was good enough that my siblings were lining up to "taste test" last night and showed their enthusiasm today at lunch by eating multiple bowls of pasta with the chili. The modified recipe follows:

Almost-vegan Cincinnati Chili


1 1/2 cups dried soybeans

1 quart hot water
2 chopped onions
3 (8 oz) cans tomato sauce
1/2 teaspoon allspice
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
4 tablespoons chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin powder
1/4 teaspoon cloves
2 tablespoons white vinegar
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
2 bay leaves
2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
2 teaspoons cinnamon
2 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 teaspoon red pepper (optional)


The day before you want to eat the chili, let the soybeans soak at least 4 hours in enough water to let them double in volume. That night, or the next morning, drain the soybeans and process them in a food processor or blender until broken into small pieces. Add the rest of the ingredients and simmer 3 hours. Serve hot over spaghetti.

Buon appetito!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Thankful For: My Roommates

This afternoon I had a thought-provoking moment.  Brian was talking about the timelessness of the song Tomorrow from Annie and, of course, I began singing.  Halfway through the first verse, he looked at me and asked, "Why don't you have a girlfriend?"  I went mute.  After a moment of absolute shock, I realized that he was completely serious and it was meant to be a major compliment.  Tim's reply: "Well, maybe he's looking for someone that matches his eating habits.  That might be hard to find." Brian: "If I were a girl, I would change my eating habits - I mean, seriously - he's David!"  Tim: "But some girls like chocolate and things like that."  Brian: "More than they like David?"

Aside from the thoughts that the conversation spurred (what can I do so girls want to date me & what should I look for in a future spouse), I felt an overwhelming sense of love for my roommates.  They are amazing.  They are real, down-to-earth, hard working, and striving to be better each day.  And we are each so totally different.  Bryan shows me off whenever I'm around and tells others that I'm an incredible cook.  Tim calls me a marginality in reference to the statistical, pessimistic explanations he gives about humanity (which has got to be a compliment, coming from him)... Hans doesn't complain even when my part of the room is an absolute mess, I wake up at 5:15 in the morning, or go to sleep at 1:00 in the morning because I was reading or writing in my journal... and Stuart tells me, in his very frank and upfront way, about the things I do well.  

Each time I look at the skills and talents they each have, and how willing they are to share that love with me, I realize how much I love my roommates.  I don't feel like I'm incredibly good at developing relationships (maybe that's the answer to Brian's question)... but I can tell that they care... and for that I am grateful.

Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving season, I wanted to take the opportunity to just give thanks. Here goes!


I’m grateful for… the faces of flowers as they follow the sun… the thunder that rolls when it rains… the mountains that shadow my home here in Provo… and the fields near my home on the plains… the cool breeze that blows when I wake before sunrise… the night-time, with stars up above… for the earth and its splendor I give thanks to Thee… for in them I remember Thy love.


I’m grateful for… the power to dance and to walk and to run… eyes, to see and behold… a musical voice that won’t shatter a mirror… and a passion for learning that will never grow cold… a mind that can grasp even quarks in an instant… the duty to work and to write… for my body, my gifts and my talents and strengths… for in them I am blessed by Thy light.


I’m grateful for… my laptop that follows me even in sleepwalk… my car which conducts me each day… a home with a bed and a high-speed connection… and a health food store not far away… the privilege of building a School up in Zion… my application to attend MIT… I am grateful for earthly possessions and pathways… for in walking I come unto Thee.


I’m grateful for… the sorrow we taste at a loved one's departure… the anguish I feel when I fail… the bruises and scars that remind me of heartache… and the sadness that often will seem to prevail… the cold I’ve been fighting since last Wednesday evening… our world filled with sadness and strife… I give thanks for my trials and sickness and pain… for they bring me to Thee throughout life.


I’m grateful for… a boy who, not 15, was chosen by Heaven… the Gospel he then brought to light… the knowledge that I can return to God’s presence… and the faith to shine as a star in the night… the power to bless in the name of the Savior… a family sealed for time without end… for the truth now revealed I give praises to Thee… for through them I can grow and transcend.


I’m grateful for… a mother who gave up Olympics and rockets… a father whose love knows no end… my brothers and sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins… those who are willing to love me and call me a friend… my colleagues and roommates and classmates and mentors… the people who lift me above… for my loved ones in life I give thanks unto Thee… for in Them I remember Thy love.


When the time rolls around that I think of Thanksgiving… and all that’s been given to me… for my blessings and trials, my family and friends, I give thanks, dearest Lord, unto Thee.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Learning, by Trials and also by Faith

Dear Family and Friends,


I went to the MTC on Monday and had two more incredible experiences. The first, from two sisters missionaries, was the promise that I would receive blessings beyond my imagination for following the commandments of the Lord. Now I only need to follow them. The next was an Elder who seemed a bit forward in his communication... he asked me about my family and if I ever intended to marry. I was a bit taken aback and responded that it took 2 people... and that I hadn't yet found anyone. Later in the lesson, he promised me that, if I would pray with faith, that the Lord would grant me my heart's desire with regards to my family.


As I walked to my car later that evening, I realized what he had promised. It was a spiritual blank check – like what had happened to King Solomon. The Lord would grant me my heart's desire with regards to my family. Solomon could have asked for wealth, fame, or power... but he asked for wisdom. What would I ask for? What really was the desire of my heart? I began praying out loud and spoke with the Lord. Only moments later, I realized what was happening. The Lord was teaching me a lesson in faith. Even though I want to find my eternal companion beyond almost anything else, there is something I want even more. I want to be the best companion I can be. I want to be a better son, a better brother, a better nephew and grandson and cousin and friend. And so that's what I asked for. I had a thought that maybe there were multiple lines on the blank check, so I then explained that I wanted to find my eternal companion as well... but if the promise was for only one desire, then I wanted to become a better man before I meet her someday.


Looking back, I realize how much I have changed. A year ago, I think I may have asked to find my wife or to understand why it wasn't yet time. Now, I am willing to ask for the spiritual help to become a better man. I've certainly changed; hopefully He can help me to become better.


Wednesday morning I had a nightmare that left me absolutely shaking. Nightmares when I was little were based on fear. I didn't think I was afraid of much, but I was struck with terror at the vision of huge soldiers that would stalk me, their footsteps constantly echoing in the darkness... with no way to hide... and always running. As I've conquered my fears, those nightmares went away. Now my nightmares are revelations on my inner self... mirrors of truth showing me things I really don't want to see.


For the first part of the day, the effects of the nightmare were terrible. I was in shock and shaking. I wondered how I could be such a horrible person – how such a fatal flaw in my character could have gone unchecked for so long. The day went on and I struggled in my classes (only winning in racquetball because my opponent was using his left hand). I held a review session for physics and, after we had gone over basic concepts of rotation, I tried to help the 30 students who were there on their homework. I looked at the problem and had no clue even how to start. I didn't know how to access the solutions, and we were all stuck, so I closed the session and sent the students home. Not only was I a terrible person, I was also a terrible TA.


I got in my car and sat there, thinking about everything that had happened. I hadn't felt this horrible in a while... and I wondered why. And then I realized what was happening. On Monday, I had asked the Lord for help in becoming a better... and He was simply showing me the things I needed to do to improve who I was. With a rueful smile, I remembered the exact words of the missionaries at the MTC. They had promised me that my desire would come “maybe not today, or tomorrow, but soon.” Monday = today. Tuesday = tomorrow. On the morning of the 3rd day, Wednesday, my boot camp of perfection began. First lessons: tranquility and humility. I only hoped that I could make it out alive.


But, in the midst of my temporary affliction, the Lord found ways to help me smile. I received news that I had won second place in an essay contest I entered a few months ago. The funny part takes a bit of a story. Tuesday (the day before) was the bookstore's store-wide 20% off sale. I've signed up to take an art class next semester, so after counseling with the art manager (and spending 2 hours looking and choosing) I spent $100 on supplies and other things. I have a really hard time spending any money, so it was impressive that I could spend that much. And then the next day I learned what the prize was for second place in the essay contest: a $200 gift card to the BYU Bookstore. The Lord definitely has a sense of humor.


Each subsequent day had a lesson to be learned. Thursday I got sick and learned some more about gratitude (I sometimes take good health for granted since I try to be very healthy. The Lord just wanted to remind me that He is the one supporting me, even when I eat only healthy food, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep.). Friday was on the importance of allowing others to be a part of my life, Saturday focused on optimism, and Sunday helped me see the blessings of making and keeping promises to the Lord. (Side note: I also learned how much I rely on the Lord even when I am relying on technology. I finished this letter once, went to save it, and the computer froze. Nothing would convince it to wake back up, so I had to rewrite a few paragraphs. Maybe it's the Lord's way of teaching through repetition?)


In all, it's been a great week. In my classes at BYU, sometimes I wish I could learn faster – that the teacher would just give us all the information at once and let us sort it all out. When the Lord is teaching me, He does exactly that. And though I've wondered if it will completely overwhelm me, I feel great! I know that the Lord is always here beside us. He wants us to become better, and is willing to teach us as quickly as we are willing to learn. Not able – willing. He will enable us to learn more quickly than we ever thought possible. I know that as we become better people, members of our family, and citizens in our community, our lives will be happier and we will be better able to bless the lives of those around us. So – the challenge this week is this: Ask the Lord for help in identifying and changing the things you need to do to become a better person. In the end, you will be happier for the experience, even if it means going through a few days of spiritual boot camp. Brace yourselves... and go out and be missionaries!


I love you all!


David

Friday, November 14, 2008

And the Check is Cashed...

Wednesday morning I had a nightmare that left me absolutely shaking. Nightmares when I was little were based on fear. I didn't think I was afraid of much, but I was struck with terror at the vision of huge soldiers that would stalk me, their footsteps constantly echoing in the darkness... with no way to hide... and always running. As I've conquered my fears, those nightmares went away. Now my nightmares are revelations on my inner self... mirrors of truth showing me things I really don't want to see.


Sometimes I let my feelings boil. I see or experience something unjust in the world, and indignation rises up inside me until I could breathe fire. I never do, in real life. I let time quench the flames and write my feelings to temper them, using the fire as fuel to work for change. But while they rage I am in dangerous territory. In my dream, one rash decision left me with images of how my actions could injure those I love. The dream itself was only seconds long... but showed me, in a an incredibly memorable way, how I needed to change.


For the first part of the day, the effects of the nightmare were terrible. I was in shock and shaking. I wondered how I could be such a horrible person – how such a fatal flaw in my character could have gone unchecked for so long. The day went on and I struggled in my classes (only winning in racquetball because my opponent was using his left hand). I held a review session for physics and, after we had gone over basic concepts of rotation, I tried to help the 30 students who were there on their homework. I looked at the problem and had no clue even how to start. I didn't know how to access the solutions, and we were all stuck, so I closed the session and sent the students home. Not only was I a terrible person, I was also a terrible TA.


I got in my car and sat there, thinking about everything that had happened. I hadn't felt this horrible in a while... and I wondered why. And then I realized what was happening. On Monday, I had asked the Lord for help in becoming a better... and He was simply showing me the things I needed to do to improve who I was. With a rueful smile, I remembered the exact words of the missionaries at the MTC. They had promised me that my desire would come “maybe not today, or tomorrow, but soon.” Monday = today. Tuesday = tomorrow. On the morning of the 3rd day, Wednesday, my boot camp of perfection began. Today's lesson: Tranquility and Humility.  I only hope that I can make it out alive.

Blank Check at the MTC

I went to the MTC on Monday and had two more incredible experiences. The first, from two sisters missionaries, was the promise that I would receive blessings beyond my imagination for following the commandments of the Lord. Now I only need to follow them. The next was an Elder who seemed a bit forward in his communication... he asked me about my family and if I ever intended to marry. I was a bit taken aback and responded that it took 2 people... and that I hadn't yet found anyone. Later in the lesson, he promised me that, if I would pray with faith, that the Lord would grant me my heart's desire with regards to my family.


As I walked to my car later that evening, I realized what he had promised. It was a spiritual blank check – like what had happened to King Solomon. The Lord would grant me my heart's desire with regards to my family. Solomon could have asked for wealth, fame, or power... but he asked for wisdom. What would I ask for? What really was the desire of my heart? I began praying out loud and spoke with the Lord. Only moments later, I realized what was happening. The Lord was teaching me a lesson in faith. Even though I want to find my eternal companion beyond almost anything else, there is something I want even more. I want to be the best companion I can be. I want to be a better son, a better brother, a better nephew and grandson and cousin and friend. And so that's what I asked for. I had a thought that maybe there were multiple lines on the blank check, so I then explained that I wanted to find my eternal companion as well... but if the promise was for only one desire, then I wanted to become a better man before I meet her someday.


Looking back, I realize how much I have changed. A year ago, I think I may have asked to find my wife or to understand why it wasn't yet time. Now, I am willing to ask for the spiritual help to become a better man. I've certainly changed; hopefully He can help me to become better.

Monday, November 10, 2008

A Purpose in Life

Dear Family and Friends,


Last week, when I committed to the Lord that I was going to write my thoughts regularly, I wondered if I would ever find anything worthwhile to share with the world. He definitely kept good His word to prepare the way; I've had plenty of things about which to write.


On Monday I went to the MTC. I go once a week to be taught in Italian so that missionaries can practice their language skills in an authentic setting. Often I come home having learned something important... but this week was amazing.


Since I've realized that the Lord gave me gifts and talents, and expected me to use them, I've tried to be anxiously engaged in every cause I felt necessary. Volunteering, leadership roles, councils, church callings, athletics, music, writing, and everything else. But I realized I needed to do more than just use my talents. Alongside simply sharing my talents and gifts, there were times when I felt like I was truly fulfilling my purpose in life. Talking with a friend and seeing their eyes light up with a newly learned principle of the Gospel. Singing to a group of strangers in the middle of a Florentine Plaza. Writing and sharing my thoughts each week. But each of these events seemed disconnected – like the Lord had somehow given me a set of random talents and multiple unrelated ultimate purposes in life.


The turmoil came when I fielded my own question – if I were able to accomplish all my career goals in education in 5 years, what would I do next? Hence, for the last few weeks, I've wondered exactly what the Lord wanted my focus to be in life. When I went to the MTC this week I played the role of a Catholic university student. During the course of the lesson on the Restored Gospel, I told the missionaries of my plight. I was trying to do good, but felt there was something that would help me see a bigger picture – help to guide my every action... and I wanted to know what that was.


I'm not sure what I expected from those two Elders. The goal of the question (as part of the scenario) was to give them a reason to talk to me about personal revelation and the Restoration of the Gospel. But, deep down, I knew from personal experience that asking real questions leads to real answers... and I wanted the answer to my question. The lesson kept going in the normal route until one elder suddenly pulled out his scriptures and turned to 3 Nephi 5:13. "You talked about searching for your unique purpose in life. This is Mormon, a prophet in the Book of Mormon," he said... "and here he talks about his purpose in life. I feel that this might be your purpose in life, too." I took his scriptures and read the verse. "Behold, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. I have been called of him to declare his word among his people, that they might have everlasting life." A surge went through me as his companion looked up and said, "I have a very strong feeling that this is your purpose in life, David. This is why the Lord sent you to this earth and gave you so many talents and abilities. And this is why we are here today - to let you know that your purpose is to share the Gospel."


In a moment, every question I had ever asked the Lord ran through my head. In past years, I wondered why I had been given talents. I wondered how to use them. I wondered what tied them all together. And suddenly it all made sense. Everything I've been given was designed to help me be a missionary. My ability to write, to sing, to think, to reason, to speak, to dance, to do anything... everything was to enable me to declare the word in every way possible.


The Spirit bore witness to me that this is my purpose in life – to share the Gospel with others and help them to come unto Christ, whether through writing, singing, dancing, or anything else. I guess the next logical question was: what do I do now?


In our Freshman Academy Peer Mentor meeting that afternoon, we talked about the importance of finding and achieving our own personal ministry in life. It's interesting to note that I didn't really appreciate the importance of my experience at the MTC until I wrote it down that evening to post on my blog. Had I known what I do now at my Freshman Academy meeting, I would have shared the experience with the group... and I can already see the blessings of keeping (and sharing) a record more often than once a week.


Saturday I attended the University Student Council Conference. President Samuelsen (President of BYU) spoke, and one of his first remarks was that the Lord had inspired him to leave his carefully prepared address in the filing cabinet. In addressing us, he said,


"I may not understand everything, but I do know that you are not here by chance. And you are not here for unimportant reasons. You have been commissioned to do some very important things in your lives. That's a very different thing than thinking you are better than others... but you have heavier responsibilities.... and you have gifts and talents that are very uncommon in the world."


I began to think about my own life, my own responsibilities, and my own commission to bring others unto Christ. The question I had asked myself at the MTC echoed in my mind: what do I do now? A few minutes later, President Samuelsen voiced a reply. "The Holy Ghost will teach and help us to know the next steps to know what we need to do and what we need to be." He talked about the importance of paying the price of excellence, relating the progress of finding and following each of our personal ministries to learning to play the piano. Are we proficient piano players without practice? How can we hope to be proficient in our personal ministries if we don't invest the necessary time and effort to achieve excellence?


I thought about my own purpose in life – to share the Gospel with His children here on the earth. The question that echoed in my mind was this: What things do I need to do in order to become a better tool for sharing the light? At once, I thought of the ways I share the Gospel. Spending time singing and becoming a better singer will help me to touch the lives of others through music. Becoming a better writer is something I definitely want to do – and I will need to spend time writing every day in order to really become great someday. The difference between those that have dreams and those that accomplish their dreams is a willingness to pay the price, no matter how high.


President Samuelsen continued speaking as he explained that many of our hopes and dreams go unfulfilled. "The thing that connects our ambition and our accomplishments," he said, "is dedicated discipline." I want to be a better person, so I hope that I will have the faith to dedicate myself to the cause, no matter how high the price.


He concluded his remarks with a reference to Doctrine and Covenants 11. Seek not to declare my word, but first seek to obtain my word... and I realized one more aspect of my life in which I could improve – obtaining the word. I think that having a great memory has possibly been a stumbling block in that respect. Since I don't have to work very hard to understand or remember key points in the scriptures, it's easy for me to be happy. ...But I've realized, as time has gone on, that there is so much more contained in the scriptures... so much more that I can understand, liken, and apply in my own life.


The breakout session during the conference was also somehow aimed at helping me fulfill my purpose in life. Now that I realized what and whyI needed to share the Gospel, it was time to learn a few ways how to accomplish it. Gibb Dyer, a professor in the department of Organizational Behavior, spoke about how to truly effect change in the lives of others. Extrinsic rewards and punishments lead to compliance... but don't cause a real change. Creating emotional ties with others can also lead them to make the right choices, but the best way to help others come closer to Christ is through helping them raise their vision to see greater heights... and then give them the tools necessary to accomplish that vision. Then they will change themselves.


I thought that my week-long course on my purpose in life had finished... but then I went to the BYU vs. SDSU football game on Saturday. Near the end of the game, the announcer asked the fans to stay in the stadium to recognize the graduating seniors from the team. As music began to play in the background, I watched the other players gather to form a pathway with the cheer squad... and then Coach Mendenhall and others shook hands with each player and their accompanying family members.


I smiled to see that some players were there with an entourage of followers... layered with Hawaiian lei's so you could barely see their faces... to the cheers of an enormous crowd. Some held hands of their sweethearts. Others simply walked down the pathway alone to Coach's warm embrace. As I watched the ceremony itself, I felt a pang deep inside me... a desire to be on the field, participating in the same experience. I didn't need the honorary blanket handed to each player... I didn't want the crowds to cheer when they heard my name. I just wanted to be a part of a team with someone willing to appreciate my life – to whisper in my ear a thanks for simply being.


I've been a member of lots of teams. I experienced a camaraderie with the other players, whether it was soccer, swimming, volleyball, or dance, but I often felt there was something missing.


The experience of seeing Coach Mendenhall's care and love for his players helped me realize yet another important direction in my own life. I need to try to be a mentor to others – to reach out and show that I care about them and esteem them for who they are... and to help them grow as individuals and sons and daughters of God.


I know that the Lord has given each of us incredible blessings, gifts, and talents. Before we came to this life, we agreed to assume a divine calling – a personal purpose in life that would help to accomplish His great plan. We are each unique and essential in His eyes... and He wants us to know that we are loved and esteemed. I know that as we ask in faith, He will teach us the things we need to know... show us the things we need to do... to return to live with Him someday. You are all incredible! Go out and be missionaries!


I love you all!


David

Friday, November 7, 2008

The MTC and the Purpose of Life

On Monday I went to the MTC. I go once a week to be taught in Italian so that missionaries can practice their language skills in an authentic setting. Often I come home having learned something important... but this week was amazing.

Since I've realized that the Lord gave me gifts and talents, and expected me to use them, I've tried to be anxiously engaged in every cause I felt necessary. Volunteering, leadership roles, councils, church callings, athletics, music, writing, and everything else. But, alongside simply using my talents and gifts, there were times when I felt like I was truly fulfilling my purpose in life. Talking with a friend and seeing their eyes light up with a newly learned principle of the Gospel. Singing to a group of strangers in the middle of a Florentine Plaza. Writing and sharing my thoughts each week. Everything seemed disconnected – like the Lord had somehow given me all these unrelated talents and multiple unrelated ultimate purposes in life. The thought came when I fielded my own question – if I were able to accomplish all my career goals in education in 5 years, what would I do next? For the last few weeks, I've wondered exactly what the Lord wanted my focus to be in life. I went to the MTC this week and played the role of a Catholic university student. During the course of the lesson on the Restored Gospel, I told the missionaries of my plight. I was trying to do good, but felt there was something that would help me see a bigger picture – help to guide my every action... and I wanted to know what that was.

I'm not sure what I expected from those two Elders. The goal of the question (as part of the scenario) was to give them a reason to talk to me about personal revelation and the Restoration of the Gospel. But, deep down, I knew from personal experience that asking real questions leads to real answers. The lesson kept going until one elder suddenly pulled out his scriptures and turned to 3 Nephi 5:13. “You talked about searching for your unique purpose in life. This is Mormon, a prophet in the Book of Mormon,” he said... “and here he talks about his purpose in life. I feel that this might be your purpose in life, too.” I took his scriptures and read the verse. “Behold, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, and I have been called to declare his word to his people that they may have everlasting life.” A surge went through me as his companion looked up and said, “I have a very strong feeling that this is your purpose in life, David. This is why the Lord sent you to this earth, and this is why we are here - to let you know that your purpose is to share the Gospel.”

In a moment, every question I've ever asked the Lord ran through my head. In past years, I wondered why I had been given talents. I wondered how to use them. I wondered what tied their expression together. And suddenly it all made sense. Everything I've been given was designed to help me be a missionary. My ability to write, to sing, to think, to reason, to speak, to dance, to do anything... everything was to enable me to declare the word in every way possible.

The Spirit bore witness to me that this is my purpose in life – to share the Gospel with others and help them to come unto Christ, whether through writing, singing, dancing, or anything else. I guess the next logical question is: what do I do now?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Waking Dreams

I had an interesting dream Monday morning. Among other things, it convinces me that my brain is segmented into discrete functional units. There was no visual component to the dream, only conversations. I've given the different voices names - Circadian, Cyclic, and Rational... based on what areas of the brain they seemed to represent.

Circadian: (Trying to wake me up) Wake up! Wake up! It’s 5:15 and it’s time to go to class!

Cyclic: No! He hasn’t slept enough! How can it be 5:15 already? You must have something wrong. He hasn’t had enough sleep. Go back to sleep. (I fall back asleep)

Circadian: (Trying to wake me up) Wake up! Wake up! It’s 5:30. He has to wake up now – otherwise he will be late to class!

Cyclic: He still hasn’t had enough sleep. And, anyway, if he doesn’t get enough sleep he won’t be able to function all day. It’s more important to get enough sleep than it is to be on time to this one class.

Circadian: (Frustrated) Now you’ve done it. It’s after 6:00 and he’s late to class. At this point, he probably won’t even go to class, since coach said to never come late. He got one extra hour of sleep, and now it’s going to ruin his entire day. And it’s all your fault.

Cyclic: Well, at least he got enough sleep. As I said before, it’s more important to get enough sleep than to miss one class. He’s never missed class before. And how could it be after 6:00 already? He didn’t go to sleep late last night, and he always makes sure to schedule 8 hours of sleep. There must be something wrong.

Rational (obviously, it took more time for the rational part to wake up): Why are you arguing? Doesn’t David always set an alarm for 5:15? He wakes up at 5:14 and looks at it, and then it buzzes in his hand and he turns it off. And it never stops. It’s not buzzing now – so what happened? What time is it anyway?

All Three (yelling): Wake up! Wake up! What time is it?

(I wake up, pull my phone out of my pocket, and look at the time. It’s 5:14)

Pause

All Three (moment of truth): Oh….. Daylight Savings Time.

Cyclic: I told you he hadn’t gotten enough sleep.

Circadian: How was I supposed to know? No one ever tells me about these things.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

New Traditions

Dear Family and Friends,

After a somewhat long hiatus, I've decided to begin re-posting my emails on this blog.  It's a scary prospect for me, as my audience suddenly changes from family and friends to the entire world (yes, I realize that very few will probably ever read my writing).  But I feel that it will be a stretch for me as a writer and will make my letters (which are hopefully inspiring) available to a larger audience worldwide.

I love you all!

David

Go and Do!

Dear Family and Friends,

Among other things this week, I got a letter from the company that was interviewing me for a job this summer. The text reads:

"We wish to thank you for the interest you have expressed regarding employment opportunities. After careful consideration, we have decided that we are unable to offer you a position which would fully utilize your talents. However, you are a talented individual and we know that you will make a difference in any organization you decide to join.

We appreciate the time you have invested exploring this opportunity, and wish you all the best."

One of the nice things about this company (the one that doesn't want me) is that the interview process was based more on who I was – my goals and convictions – than on my past achievements. Their goal is to hire people who already fit their corporate ideology – people who fit in without having to adapt to the environment. From the beginning of interviews, I knew that if they didn't want me... then I probably wouldn't be happy or fulfilled working for them anyway. The rejection letter, for me, represents the Lord's hand in my life. He has promised to tell me if I begin heading in the wrong direction. He did.

I met with one of the faculty members from my Freshman Academy community on Wednesday. Her husband was the High Councilor over my ward last year. Yes, it's a very small world here at BYU. Anyway, I saw him (the High Councilor-husband) at a class fireside two weeks ago – the day I received my book contract from Cedar Fort. I told him about my experience; he congratulated me and then looked very deep in thought for the rest of the evening. At our meeting on Wednesday, my professor told me that her husband had been so inspired by my success that he had gone home and submitted a book he had been working on for years to my same publisher... and that they had just received word that Cedar Fort wanted to publish his book as well.

As I walked away from our short meeting, I felt amazing. When I am able to accomplish something incredible, I feel incredible. But when, somehow, something I do inspires another to even greater heights, the feeling is even greater. It reminds me of the parable of the ten lepers. How many people do we influence for the better who don't come back and share the tale? I definitely don't expect everyone I've ever met to tell me how I've influenced their lives... but it makes me wonder.

I'm not sure if I've shared the story of how I wrote 10 Days Until Forever. One night this past summer, I woke up shortly after falling asleep with an incredibly vivid prompting. "David, you need to write this book." All I could see in my head was a little boy asking, "How long until forever?" I was exhausted, but went downstairs, opened my laptop, and began writing. An hour later, after I had outlined the beginning and end of the book, I went back to bed. The next day I woke up early, wrote most of the pages (it's a children's book), and read them out loud to my younger siblings. I finished the book, edited it once, and later that week I submitted it to the only publishers who were currently accepting LDS-themed children's books – Deseret Book, Covenant Communications, and Cedar Fort. The book is called 10 Days Until Forever and follows a family that adopts a little boy. Each day, a member of the family reaches out to the boy to show him that he is a valuable part of their community, whether it's Mother making brownies with him on the first day or his sister letting him turn (and drop) the pages of her piano music. Each day he asks, "How long until forever?" At the end of the book, the family pulls together and accomplishes the incredible.

At first I expected the book to be rejected, since "every first-time author gets rejected," especially on the first round of submissions. I didn't want to get my hopes up... and I wanted to cut my teeth on rejection letters before I got one for the inspirational book I've been writing. Deseret and Covenant sent form rejection letters, but Cedar Fort was interested (as long as I un-edited the one part I had changed). The book should be available on shelves August 2009.

So my message this week is to simply go and do. The Lord wants to bless us. But He can't give us success beyond our dreams if we don't give Him the chance. Simply going and doing gives Him that opportunity. We may fail (over and over again), but eventually the Lord will guide us in the right path and make us into tools in His hand... and we will have an impact on the lives of those around us. Maybe the Lord will inspire us to write a book. Maybe it will be to make cookies for a friend... or to simply reach out to a loved one in need. Sometimes, as in the case of my faculty member, we learn about the incredible things that others have done. Often, however, our good influence may seem to go un-thanked, unacknowledged, unnoticed. But even if you can't see it and no one tells you... your simply being a faithful saint makes a profound difference in the lives of everyone you meet.

I know that the Lord is watching us. He takes notice of all the things we do and the effect we have on the lives of others. I know that if we will simply go and do (and follow the promptings of the Spirit), He will guide us and help us to really make a difference. He will help us to lift those around us by our actions, no matter how small they may seem. He will help us be missionaries!

I love you all!

David
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